Last week was an extremely emotional and exhausting week, so it really was no surprise to me that over the weekend I fell apart and made terrible dietary choices and as a result I feel not only disappointed, but sick to my stomach from nasty food.
Last Sunday I ran out of my hormone medication from my hysterectomy I had in December. I will be on this medication for at least the forseeable future, and I found out the hard way how vital it is for me at this point in my healing. I called to refill my prescription and was told that it was backordered and they would get it as soon as possible. Since I have never been without it, I really had no idea how much I would need it. By Tuesday I was having hot flashes like I was going to burn to ashes on the spot, and my emotions were so erratic I laughed at something not even funny at one moment and cried at a Cottenelle commercial the next. My poor daughter was very confused at this bizarre Mommy behavior, especially since I am normally very mellow emotionally. My husband handled it all like a champ even though I can only imagine how frustrating and confusing it was for him. Sadly craving for foods were increased by about 100%, but I was able to deny them for the most part. My sleep patterns suffered the worst. I averaged about 4 hours total in a 24 hour period, so you can imagine how I felt. By Friday I was on fire, totally depressed, exhausted, and my eyes were sore and puffy from crying about absolutely nothing!
Thankfully I was able to get my hormone medication Friday afternoon, and then I went home and baked cupcakes for a baby shower the following day. I was able to resist temptation and not eat any, but Saturday at the baby shower I began my unhealthy eating cycle, and Sunday my husband and I ate out twice because I dreaded going through the refrigerator and seeing all the wasted food from me not prepping it properly during the week because I was too exhausted. No matter the reason, I chose avoidance and now am at work feeling like I want to vomit because of greasy food.
If there is a positive out of my weekend weakness, I am definitely aware now of how much better I feel when I am eating healthy and exercising daily. Now I need to suck it up, stop feeling sorry for myself and get back on track. I also need very desperately to figure out my sleep schedule because this current schedule is absolutely kicking my butt and I can't continue on long term like this. Back to one day at a time, and we will hope this weekend is much better than the weekend was.
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